Suns to Fans: Fuck You.

I have no words. If someone can come up with a caption that accurately describes this, then by all means, add it.

Pending a physical, which Suns fans are praying Shaq fails, the Suns are reportedly intent on shipping all-star Shawn Marion and idiot point guard Marcus Banks to the Heat in exchange for Shaquille O'Neal.

That's the Suns, the up-tempo team that has changed the way that teams play in the West pushing the running game and scoring loads of points, trading for a 35 year old, hobbled, 350 pound center who also starred in Kazaam.

The Suns, who have been so desperate to shed salary that they've essentially given away their first round draft picks over the last few years, trading for someone who'll be making $20 million per until 2010.

The Suns, who already have two strong players capable of starting at center (Amare Stoudamire, Boris Diaw), trading for a player whose scoring numbers have dropped by 13 ppg in the past 5 years while giving up a four time all-star who averages a double-double over his career and is currently in his prime (28 years old).

The Suns, who have the best record in the west and were arguably a Robert Horry foul away from making the NBA Finals last year, are making a trade to make them slower and bog down their payroll.

Maybe they know something I don't. Maybe Shaq is just biding his time, waiting to get traded to turn it on; hell, he hasn't been in shape during the regular season for years now. Maybe Marion really is a team cancer and Shaq's locker room presence will unite the Suns and give them the boost they need to top the Spurs.

Or maybe general manager Steve Kerr is just an idiot. Anyone who's read his old columns on Yahoo! already knows that he's functionally retarded, so why not throw a bunch of shit together like this was NBA Live '03 and see if it works? It's not like anything else for the Suns makes all that much sense.

Nickname: Suns. Mascot: Gorilla. A logical progression.