Opposite Day in Pittsburgh: Pirates Trade Prospect for Light-Hitting Veteran

Thanks to Buccofans.com for this informative history. One day, we'll use it to cry ourselves to sleep...

Apparently 2010 will be different for the Buccos. Pirates fans generally know what to expect when July rolls around - flipping the team's veteran players for prospects. Sometimes it's a shrewd practice that sends out a one year contract veteran to a competing team (Eric Hinske, Mark Redman, Arthur Rhodes) in exchange for some lukewarm prospects, other times it's a complete fire sale shipping out longtime players and former All-Stars (Jason Bay, Jack Wilson, Freddy Sanchez) for slightly better prospects. And sometimes it's a combination of the two (Aramis Ramirez and Kenny Lofton to Chicago for Bobby Hill, Jose Hernandez, and Matt Bruback...)

We gave up Aramis Ramirez for this?

Most of the bad trades were trademarks of the Dave Littlefield era, which ended in 2007. The Neal Huntington era has seen higher profile trades that haven't had enough time to be properly judged. And now this:

Nov. 3, 2009 - RHP Jesse Chavez to Tampa Bay for 2b/3b Akinori Iwamura.

At the very least, it's different.

Welcome to the Pirates. You'll find Tampa and Pittsburgh are very similar cities.

Chavez is a 26 year old reliever who posted an ERA of 4.01 in his team-high 73 appearances and 15 holds. He was arguably the team's third best reliever after John Grabow was traded (for some very average prospects) behind Evan Meek and Steven Jackson. Iwamura, on the other hand, was a touted player coming out of Japan that failed to be more than a placeholder in Tampa. He missed half of last year due to injury, has never hit for power, and never driven in more than 48 RBIs in a season. So why make this trade?

With Meek and Jackson, the Pirates had three right handed middle relievers with limited ceilings on their talent. They sold high on Chavez, who had seemingly the smallest window for Major League success and will now have to prove himself as a pitcher without great stuff in a superior league. Meanwhile, Iwamura plays solid defense, gets on base, hits around .270-.300, and is an unselfish teammate, as evidenced when he quietly moved from 3rd base to 2nd to allow Evan Longoria to start. Does that sound familiar to Pirates fans?

To me, THIS MAN is the face of the Pirates. That's the most depressing thing I've ever written here...

Yes, in this deal the Buccos have essentially brought back the Japanese hybrid Freddy Sanchez/Jack Wilson. Iwamura, if healthy, will probably bat around .270, hit 10 home runs, and drive in 50 RBIs. Not great production, but with solid defense he can be a contributor to the team. What's more telling is the Pirates' lack of confidence in their free agency skills.

Iwamura was set to be bought out of the final year of his contract by the Rays for $650,000. Instead, the Buccos swooped in with this trade, keeping the contract valid, and ensuring Iwamura's $4.85 million to be paid in 2010. If Huntington wanted to gamble, he could have let Iwamura become a free agent, offered him more than market value, and still likely saved ~$2 million or so. Akinori isn't exactly hot property right now.

But instead, the Pirates got their replacement at second base, and he'll make nearly twice as much as their 2nd most highly paid player, Paul Maholm. Iwamura will make twice as much as the Bucs entire outfield corps (5 players) in 2010. In fact, he'll make more than the entire infield - combined (8 players!).

The cornerstone of the franchise makes 1/12th what Iwamura will make...that might come up around contract extension time.

The Pirates are sending a message that they're willing to pay for the right players. Unfortunately, Iwamura doesn't fit that bill.

The Pacers Season Ticket Experiment: Game 2

The lower and club levels a minute after tipoff...you don't want to see the balcony...

Oh...boy. Well, on the plus side, the ticket office will probably have some sweet promotions to offset this mess.

Game Two of my season ticket package was last night against 2009 Western Conference Finalists Denver. Though it was a Tuesday, you'd think players like Carmelo Anthony and Chauncey Billups would help fill an arena. In fact, the Nuggets themselves are like a classroom of life's bad examples. 'Melo could be especially useful for parents trying to teach their children the virtues of not snitching, Kenyon Martin could teach children how to respectfully deal with the mothers of your peers, Anthony Carter could lecture on reading comprehension during contract talks, and Chris Andersen could share his views on crystal meth and their effects on the athlete. But no one was buying it...and the Pacers didn't show anything that would keep the fans coming back.

That's Professor Andersen to you, son.

Indiana continued their slide by playing terrible basketball. Much like the home opener, they lost a key big man when Troy Murphy went out with a back injury in the first half. Roy Hibbert, Solomon Jones, and Josh McRoberts were unable to pick up the slack, giving up lots of offensive rebounds and second chance points. Brandon Rush and Danny Granger both failed to hit their shots and had trouble getting anything going in the pain, and T.J. Ford forced the action too much at point guard, often ruining fast breaks by dribbling into defenders or taking contested jumpers.

Granger picks up his second straight A"F"G Award for awful 3-pt shooting (2-10).

The Hibbert/Jones rotation at center is rigid and mostly ineffective - Hibbert did most of his damage in garbage time. O'Brien would be better suited playing smaller at times - this team is stocked with quick guards, and a lineup of Murphy/Granger/Rush/Dahntay Jones/Ford could put up some points and not get too abused defensively against teams without major low-post threats (you know...like Denver...).

The highlight of the game was probably the fans in my section. Between the foreigners who were just excited to be at an NBA game (cheering even Roy Hibbert's airballed layup) and the high school kids whose hero worship of Josh McRoberts was audible all the way down to the court in a mostly vacant Fieldhouse, at least they kept it interesting. Hopefully those guys will be there for weekend games too, so I can get drunk enough to be excited about Josh McRoberts with them (or even Travis Diener).

Next game: 11/6 vs. Washington

Level of excitement: 3/5 (Friday night game...a banner raising for Mel Simon...sounds good)

(Editor's note: level of excitement for Pacers games depicted by Achewood characters along with a scale of 1-5)

The Pacers Season Ticket Experiment: Game 1 (Home opener)

I didn't mean Packers...should I have?

Season opener! Pacers! Heat!

The return of Jermaine O'Neal! A gimpy Danny Granger! A half full arena! A free Third Eye Blind concert outdoors in the pouring rain! Can basketball in Indiana get any better than this?

Yes. Yes it can.

Thanks to the rain and congestion due to the Pacers block party (featuring 3EB playing inside what looked like would have been a pretty crowded tent...if only more than 100 people showed up), it took a solid 45 minutes to drive the approximate mile from my office to the Conseco Fieldhouse. Rather than wait around for the concert in weather that would have made a circus depressing, we decided to get drinks and food nearby. In fact, one of the best things about the Fieldhouse is its proximity to decent bars downtown.

Unlike most other modern arenas that are surrounded by opportunistic restaurants/bars/grilles that have jacked up prices, you can drink pretty cheaply about a block from the Fieldhouse (~$2.50.beer). For the two hours before the tip, we put down dinner and ten drinks for about $40 after tip at Coaches', which always has good music and lots of TVs. Sadly, however, this meant that we'd miss the Third Eye Bling encore set, which I assume would have just been "How's it Gonna Be?" three times in a row, followed by some polite applause and the teenage version of myself trying to figure out how to put it on a mix tape for this girl I know.

Actually, that's not a bad parallel for this Pacers season...

It's like they sing the words my heart can't say! Also, is that Paul Rudd?

The game itself seemed to be a bad omen for the Pacers' season. The team fell into a repeated pattern of falling behind, then using spurts to get back into the game, and then falling into a deeper hole. Key players disappeared for extended periods - Troy Murphy pulled down 12 rebounds in the first half, and then faded into the background for the 2nd. Brandon Rush couldn't find his shot and barely played due to foul trouble. And Danny Granger found himself the focus of the Miami defense and put up an Alex Gordon-esque 12 three-pointers, many in bad situations. And much like Alex Gordon would have, he only made three of these.

Danny Granger: Winner of the first ever Alex "Fucking" Gordon award for Poor Decision Making.

Solomon Jones and Roy Hibbert split the minutes at Center, contributing 12 rebounds...and 11 fouls. They made Jermaine O'Neal look like he was 25 again, giving up 22 and 12 to him in just 32 minutes on the court. And T.J. Ford was...invisible. I honestly have no recollection of him having any impact on the game, positively or negatively. The only bright spot was Luther Head's play, and although he's a bit of a gunner and makes bad decisions, he's still a rotation caliber NBA player who can score and play defense.

So it was a bad start to the season with few silver linings. The team looks worse than last year, and improving on 36 wins seems...unlikely. But on the plus side, at least the team gave out free flags to hang off your car window for your depressing drives home from the Fieldhouse!

Thanks, Pacers! I feel better about my season ticket investment already!

Next game: vs. Denver 11/3 (Tonight...yeah I know that this is late as hell...)

Level of Excitement: 2/5

(Editor's note: level of excitement for Pacers games depicted by Achewood characters along with a scale of 1-5)

Did the Slumping Economy Save the Celtics 2010 Season?

Carl Everett proved that Boston fans love crazy...until you assault an ump/ref. The bar is set pretty low, 'Sheed!

First off, this is all speculation. No one knows how the 2010 Celtics will gel together, especially with the additions of Rasheed Wallace and Marquis Daniels, along with Rajon Rondo playing without an extension after getting ripped by his GM this offseason. What we do know is that the experts and scouts at ESPN like their chances this year - half chose them to make it to the NBA Finals this year out of a talented Eastern Conference.

The logic there makes sense. This was a team that won a NBA Championship 2 years ago and was a fierce opponent in the regular season before losing Kevin Garnett. Now Garnett is back, and the team has addressed its biggest weakness by reloading the bench with Sheed, 'Quisy, and re-signing Glen "Big Baby" Davis. It leaves the Celtics rotation looking like this:

• C - Perkins/Wallace
• PF - Garnett/Davis
• SF - Pierce/Daniels (will also share PG role)
• SG - Allen/House (PG role)
• PG - Rondo/

While still thin in the backcourt, it is a major upgrade over last year's bench, especially after Leon Powe was lost for the postseason. That team was forced to start Big Baby in Garnett's absence, and play Brian Scalabrine (!) meaningful minutes at the 4 and 5, while occasionally ceding PG duties to a half-crazed Stephon Marbury. How were they able to pull that off with $58 million tied up in salary for the "Three Amigos" and the NBA's salary cap at $57.7 million in 2010?

Not pictured - Brian Scalabrine

Thrifty shopping, a solid use of exceptions, and decreased market value of players made this team possible. Essentially, in locking up Daniels, Davis, and Wallace, they secured three players that would likely have gotten Mid-Level Exception deals in the economic climate of 2006 for under $11 million, a savings of approximately $7 million to the deal. Additionally, the use of free agency exceptions ($5.8m mid-level for 'Sheed, $1.99m biannual for Daniels) allowed the team to reload with free agents despite being well over the cap.

But how did the economy play a role? Let's take a look at the caliber of player that was signing these deals just three years ago.

In 2006, the key Mid-level exception signings ($5.2 million) were:

• Vlad Radmanovic - Lakers
• Jerome James – Knicks (A possible exception due to Isiah Thomas’s awfulness as GM)
• Tim Thomas - Suns
• Nazr Mohammed - Pistons

In 2008, these signings ($5.5m) were:

• DeSagana Diop - Dallas
• Chris Duhon - New York
• James Posey - New Orleans
• Beno Udrih - Sacramento

It appears that both Wallace and Davis would have fit into past trends on MLE players; Wallace an aging post presence with a stout defensive base, and Davis an up-and-coming big man with unexplored potential and a solid background. In 2006 – and possibly 2008, either player would have been worth about $6 million per year. In fact, the argument could be made that in a more competitive market, Wallace would have been worth between $8-10 million due to his status in the league – although his talent is clearly on the decline. Would a 32-year-old Rasheed be worth $8m/year for 4 years? In 2006, it would be a feasible argument.

What about Daniels? $2 million per seems awfully low for a player who averaged nearly 14 points per game while filling roles all over the court. Daniels was a key factor in setting up the Pacers’ offense with his slashing drive, and rebounded and defended well in Indiana – could he have gotten more on the market? Let’s look at players who were in similar situations in 2006:

Similar Contracts:

• Melvin Ely ($3.3m) – Bobcats
• Flip Murray ($3.5m over 2 years) – Pistons
• Jackie Butler (7m over 3 years) – Spurs
• Aaron Williams ($3.6m over 2 years) – Clippers
• Shammond Williams ($1.75m) – Lakers

Similar Players:

• Anthony Parker ($12m over 3 years) - Raptors
• Fred Jones ($11m over 3 years) – Raptors

The Jones signing has several parallels to Daniels – a former athletic Pacers guard who looked good in short minutes, has a spotty reputation for shooting the 3, and can play the 1/2/3 positions. Though Daniels put up better numbers in their respective contract years, he’ll be making a little over half what Fred Jones made. Maybe part of that is the premium for playing on a winning team, but it’s still a deep discount to play in Boston.

Bargains were a key to the 2008 championship in Boston as well. Danny Ainge took a huge gamble in banking on a 2nd year player to lead his team from the point guard position. A huge factor in that decision was Rondo's rookie scale contract, which made throwing the young player into the fire a more palatable choice than trading for a higher priced veteran. The risk paid off – the team won a championship and Rondo built on that confidence and appears to only be getting better after a near triple double in last year's playoffs.

But…what if?

Let's say the economy doesn’t tank, and the NBA is still a league reliant on bloated contracts. Players like Zaza Pachulia, Hakim Warrick, Linas Kleiza, and Ramon Sessions, are commanding the full MLE in a weak free agent crop. This inflation is prevalent in most contracts, just like in 2006. What do the Celtics get with their exceptions? Two possible scenarios:

1. Rasheed gets the MLE (leaving money on the table to play in Boston), Davis leaves in free agency to another team willing to offer him the full MLE, and the Biannual exception goes to…Anthony Carter?
2. Davis is locked up for the full MLE, Sheed goes to Cleveland, and the Biannual exception goes to…Jarron Collins?

He could be needlessly fouling people in a whole different uniform!

In both hypotheticals, the outcome is clear – the Celtics end up being a team that only goes seven deep with quality players, instead of nine. Their fourth big is still Brian Scalabrine, and their depth at the 1/2/3 is still questionable, leading to more minutes for Tony Allen and more Celtics fans committing acts of violence from watching him play. The good players that they fail to sign just reinforce their competitors, and the starters have to play more in the regular season because of an inferior bench and leave themselves open to fatigue.

Like 2008, they stand one bad injury away from losing a title shot. However, thanks to the tanking financials of the 2010 NBA season, they’re reloaded with the strongest team (on paper) that they’ve had since the Bird era. So if you’re a Boston fan, the recession isn’t so bad; it’s the rebound you need to keep an eye on.

The Pacers Season Ticket Experiment: Game #2

Danny Granger: If he gets injured, the team moves to Omaha.

After missing the first game in my season ticket package, I finally got out to see the other preseason home game in my package - Pacers/Rockets. Last Friday the former Western Conference contenders (is it out of line to assume that they'll be lottery bound this year without Yao, Artest, and McGrady?) came to Indiana for game 4 of their preseason schedule. One the Pacers side of things, there were no fancy promotions or ticket sales, just the standard pre-game email with the starting lineups, which seem to finally be rounding into season opener shape. Our starters?

PG - TJ Ford

SG - Brandon Rush

SF - Danny Granger

PF - Troy Murphy

C - Roy Hibbert

Not bad. Young and possibly a little injury prone, but not bad. Our arena?

To be fair, at least 20 more fans trickled in after the tipoff...

Not full. Not remotely. Which is great if you're trying to figure out each replacement referee's accent during foul calls from the balcony. Not as great if you're one of the Pacers staffers in charge of hyping up the fans. At one point, we had a 7 person hype crew come to our section, only to realize that they outnumbered us before leaving quietly.

Come on Pacer fans, get LOUD!

I'd estimate maybe 3,000 people attended the game. And this was a beautiful Friday night. It was so bad that the scalpers were still trying to sell tickets as a I left midway through the 3rd quarter. As for the game? Well the game was good, and hopefully an indicator of the Pacers play this year.

O'Brien-ball was in effect throughout the first half with fast breaks, strong ball movement, and solid 3-pt shooting propelling the Pacers to a big first half lead. Of particular note, the Pacers did two things that they'll need to do in order to win games this year:

1. Set up T.J. Ford as a playmaker, but ensure that he doesn't waste too much time dribbling down the shot clock without passing - last year, this led to way too many fall away jumpers as the shot clock expired. The T.J. I saw on Friday was more committed on defense and wasn't trying to force the offense. We'll see if it holds up.

2. Let Brandon Rush develop some confidence in his shot - In this offense, Rush needs to do two things - replace some of the slashing to the basket that Marquis Daniels did, and - more importantly - be a marksman from 3-pt range. The Rush I saw Friday pulled the trigger on his open shots, and looked more confident than the rookie version.

As usual, Granger and Murphy were solid, and are still options 1 and (a distant) 2 offensively for this team. Roy Hibbert looked very similar to how he looked last year - invisible at times, but occasionally proficient at others. As a team, the rebounding was weak - Houston's 24 offensive rebounds despite not playing anyone taller than 6-9 will attest to that. Meanwhile, the Pacers were led on the glass by 6-0 T.J. Ford and 6-3 Luther Head. Yikes.

That little guy? Leading rebounder.

Speaking of Head, he looked pretty good out there. Strong defender and a good shooter, although when Dunleavy returns he'll likely be dropped out of the rotation. Still, it's nice to see him playing his ass off for a spot. Solomon Jones, on the other hand, didn't impress anyone, although he had a couple of nice blocks when he wasn't busy not rebounding.

The arena entertainment was pretty standard, although the brass band wasn't there, you had your usual Boomer-based entertainment (but no Bowser), Pacemates dancing, and a couple giveaways. Nothing great.

I left with the team protecting a 20 point lead in the 2nd half, lamenting yet another game without a Travis Diener appearance. All in all, the game was a nice debut to watch. This team can score, and if they can hold teams to 100 points per game, they'll win more than most people thought. A playoff push isn't out of the question, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

Still, they'll take down a few good teams along the way - hell, they did it last year.

Next home game: 10/30 vs. Miami Heat (Season Opener!)

Level of Excitement: 4/5

Editor's Note: Levels of excitement depicted by Achewood characters on a 1-5 ranking.

What Could Have Been – The Banning (and Unbanning) of the American Kickboxing Academy from the UFC

2008 was a banner year for the Ultimate Fighting Championship. Their expansion and dominance over the world of mixed martial arts had never been more prevalent, as their biggest mainstream competitors – PRIDE FC and Elite XC – had been run out of commission in the past two years. To cap it all off, the company promised a groundbreaking UFC video game for release in early 2009 that would further push the sport into the mainstream. However, this expansion led to turmoil within the UFC.

While the gameplay development went relatively smoothly, the organization ran into some major concerns with fighter likenesses and usage rights. Some of these issues were minor – Clay Guida could not be included because animating his hair caused problems with the game’s physics formulas – but there was one major problem. The UFC was asking for its contracted fighters to sign contracts allowing the company lifetime usage of their image for promotional purposes. While many fighters, including UFC lifers Chuck Liddell and Georges St. Pierre, acquiesced with little conflict, welterweight contender Jon Fitch did not.

Clay Guida’s hair, completely unprogramable.

Fitch, coming off a UFC 87 loss to champion St. Pierre, was upset with the contract and refused to sign. Why? “Because it asked me for a lifetime contract for the video games, so they would have exclusive rights to use our likeness for these video games and we couldn't go and do any other video games ever again in our lifetime." Those are Fitch’s words, which seem reasonable enough, especially when he also claims that the contract wouldn’t have paid the fighters for the use of their likenesses. The UFC was in a bind – it had promised all of its fighters to game publisher THQ, and now stood to face some embarrassment, but this was something that could be worked out with a little more communication, right?

Well, no, not immediately. Jon Fitch, who had gone 8-1 in the UFC and was widely considered the second best fighter in the world in his weight class, had his contract voided by the UFC. And then the UFC cut all the guys he trained with for showing solidarity in contract talks. In essence, president Dana White banned anyone who trained at the American Kickboxing Academy (AKA) in San Jose, California, from fighting in the promotion.

Quit smiling, jackass, Dana says you're fired.

Less than 24 hours later, things were resolved. Fitch and his AKA teammates were back on the roster after a talk with UFC co-owner Lorenzo Fertitta, and they signed the video game agreement, apparently without any changes to the contract’s language. Just like that, things were back in order, and the Ultimate Fighting juggernaut rolled on. But what would have happened if the AKA remained exiled from the UFC?

The major fighters in question here make up the bulk of the UFC’s top tier of welterweights – Fitch, Mike Swick, and Josh Koscheck – respectively ranked second, fourth, and seventh in the division in BloodyElbow’s consensus rankings, would have been cut from the UFC, and in this instance, let’s assume they would be blackballed from the promotion for several years. These fighters would likely have been snatched up by Affliction or possibly Strikeforce, and then probably had their contracts optioned to Strikeforce after Affliction closed up shop and turned back into a t-shirt company for guys who can’t wear clothing without skulls on it. This also assumes that these American fighters would prefer to stay at home rather than fight in Japan with Dream (who would develop a relationship with Strikeforce in later years) or Sengoku (a long shot for elite fighters).

It is also interesting to think of what may have happened if Affliction snapped up these contracts. Could Fitch, Swick, and Koscheck have revived Affliction? It seems unlikely, as their methods of overpaying fighters, having long, uneven breaks between events, and a severe lack of depth or dedicated fanbase had doomed the promotion from the start. For the sake of argument, let's assume that even if these fighters went to Tom Atencio’s promotion, they would have ended up in Strikeforce afterwards.

More skulls! I want so many skulls that Ed Hardy craps himself when he sees this shirt!

Now, all of the sudden, Strikeforce has one of the best welterweight lineups in MMA, with Fitch, Swick, and Koscheck battling for the belt with Jake Shields (assuming he’d stay at welterweight), Nick Diaz, and Jay Hieron. The added attention to the 170 pound division may also have put pressure on the company to pick up Paul Daley’s option from Affliction rather than let him jump to the UFC. The top 5 welterweights in either promotion would look like this:

UFC (BE Rank) Strikeforce (BE Rank)

1. Georges St. Pierre (1) Jake Shields (6)
2. Thiago Alves (3) Jon Fitch (2)
3. Matt Hughes (4t) Josh Koscheck (4t)
4. Carlos Condit (8) Mike Swick (7)
5. Dan Hardy/Paulo Thiago (12/10) Paul Daley/Nick Diaz (9/18)

What was once a major gap in competition between the two groups is now much closer, and Strikeforce has the juice to either stage some big PPVs or fill up a nationally televised fight card. With their solid management and blue collar style, the UFC would see one of the most credible threats it has ever dealt with (behind only PRIDE in terms of overall talent and depth).

The only other notable fighter that would have been dropped in the equation is quickly rising heavyweight Cain Velasquez. Velasquez is the kind of fighter that Strikeforce loves – a young, hard fighting prospect from California that can rise to prominence, and then become too expensive to resign. However, given the company’s recent acquisition of Fedor Emelianenko they’ve shown a willingness to spend money on heavyweight talent. That would reshape the heavyweight division to look like this:

UFC (BE Rank) Strikeforce (BE Rank)

1. Brock Lesnar (2) Fedor Emelianenko (1)
2. Minotauro Nogueira (3) Brett Rogers (8)
3. Frank Mir (4) Andrei Arlovski (10)
4. Shane Carwin (7) Cain Velasquez (11)
5. Couture/Dos Santos (12/10) Overeem/Werdum (12/13)

While the UFC still has the edge, there’s a lot of interesting matchups to be made in this fictional Strikeforce division. Maybe even enough to get Overeem back to America to defend the belt that he hasn’t even looked at since 2007. Of course, this fails to look at the glaring holes in Strikeforce’s light heavyweight (major gaps) and lightweight (minor gaps) divisions, but these deficiencies could have been temporarily filled with more women’s title fights (an option the UFC doesn’t have) while the company reloads.

We need you to fight every time one of our divisions craps out. Think you can be a distraction?

All in all, if the UFC dropped AKA, it could have been a costly move. While Strikeforce has emerged as a legitimate threat in the past year, the ability to sign guys like Fitch, Koscheck, Swick, and Velasquez, would have been a coup for them, and given the company some notable headliners – which would have helped them sell tickets at the gate and possibly develop their network deal with CBS even faster. Though some might say that Strikeforce couldn’t afford these fighters, the deal with Fedor completed after the collapse of Affliction shows otherwise. The company is showing new signs of life, which was necessary to fill the void left by countless competitors in attempting to become an elite fighting promotion in the United States.

So the UFC made the right decision in bringing these fighters back. White’s strongarm technique worked, getting his guys to sign their contracts without seemingly losing anything on his end but a little goodwill. And if there’s one thing Dana’s public battles with fighters like Tito Ortiz and Randy Couture have shown, goodwill is only a minor negotiating ploy in the world of mixed martial arts.

Dammit Kareem!

At the very least, he remembered he was in the movie, right?

This is disappointing. Here's Kareem Abdul-Jabbar completely botching the most memorable thing he's ever done off the basketball court (his guest appearance on Full House doesn't count, because he was technically on a court while teaching Uncle Jesse how to play). And yet, despite this memorable stupidity, he still has double the money of CNN anchor Soledad O'Brien.